| Movie |
Action Jackson |
| Year |
1988 |
 |
Peter Dellaplane:
Murder is a tool!
|
|
Officer Kornblau:
So what's your name?
Albert:
A-Albert. A-Albert Smith.
Officer Lack:
Albert, your mother and father weren't by any chance brother and sister, were they?
Albert:
Hey man, what's gon' happen to me?
Officer Kornblau:
Oh, nothing. Uh, wel-nothing much, uh... you might have to endure a little session with, uh, Action Jackson.
Albert:
Wh-who's Axon...?
Officer Lack:
*Action*, Albert. *Action Jackson*.
Officer Kornblau:
Yeah, some say he didn't even have a mother. That some researchers at NASA created him to be the first man to walk on the moon without a space suit.
Officer Lack:
Mm-hmm.
Officer Kornblau:
Others say his mother was molested by Bigfoot and, uh, Jackson is their mutant offspring.
Officer Lack:
They bring in Jackson when they want to re-educate some young ne'er-do-well such as yourself, Albert.
Officer Kornblau:
Yeah, I remember one kid got re-educated so bad, his testicles climbed back up into his belly. Wouldn't come out.
Officer Lack:
They called it a medical miracle.
Officer Kornblau:
Yeah. Another kid, handcuffed to a chair; gnawed his own hand off like a trapped skunk, or wolverine, or somethin'.
|
|
Officer Kornblau:
It was a regular ***-o-rama at my place last night.
Officer Lack:
Can the*** Kornblau. There ain't been any *** at your pad since your mother helped you move in. They oughta call your place the House of Wax.
|
|
[turning a flamethrower on a bad guy]
Action Jackson:
How do you like your ribs?
|
|
Peter Dellaplane:
You have this nickname - what is it, excitement, enthusiasm, esprit de corps-
Action Jackson:
[cutting off Dellaplane] -It's ACTION!
|
|
Officer Lack:
Have you ever had your head forcibly rammed up your***
Officer Kornblau:
uh, no
Officer Lack:
Well mark your calendar...that day's coming!
|
|
Officer Kornblau:
That's one dead piece of***car builder!
|
